Chapter 20: The Fool's Sword

Sylphia, the maid, was pacing anxiously in front of the door, unable to settle.

‘He should be awake by now, right? Or, maybe today as well….’

How long had it been since a simple knock on a door had made her hesitate this much?

She hoped, above all, not to offend Kariel’s mood.

He was already struggling and sensitive; if he became even more distressed because of her….

It had only been a day, but for someone in their growth period, refusing food and drink was not a good sign.

Kariel had always eaten very little, and more often than not, he failed to sleep properly at night.

She thought things had been improving slightly recently, but….

‘He missed a day of school, so he’ll definitely be nagged for that….’

However, this time, it was a situation where neither Ermina nor Kariel could easily face one another.

As if to prove it, hadn’t even Ermina, clutching her swollen belly, avoided heading to the church?

Though such things happened often, today was quite early.

Specifically, it had happened yesterday, early in the morning.

Sylphia was even more worried because she had overheard some, if not all, of what Lueld had said to Kariel outside the door.

Lord Lueld had clearly told him to apologize to his wife, and the fact that he hadn’t… left plenty of room to think he was being rebellious or stubborn.

‘They don’t understand the Young Master’s heart….’

When Sister Patina and the Young Master had suddenly fought… at first, she thought it was part of their training or a spar.

But the conversation they shared was far from ordinary, and the emotions were so violently intense that it was obvious even to Sylphia’s eyes that it was too much for mere training.

So, she had quickly informed Ermina, the mistress.

At first, she seemed to let it pass, believing that Patina must have her own reasons.

Then, at some point.

Her complexion turned pale, and she rushed out of the room in a hurry.

What Sylphia witnessed while following her was a truly shocking sight.

If the mistress had been absent….

The Young Master’s hands and arms were….

‘Why did he go that far?’

Whenever she recalled the scene, she felt dizzy and squeezed her eyes shut.

“Sigh.”

What should she do?

No matter how much she agonized and pondered.

No clear solution came to mind.

A sense of helplessness brought a surge of depression, but.

‘No.’

I can’t let myself get depressed too!

At the very least, she had to be able to smile for him.

Even if she couldn’t be of any real help!

Just as she was composing her heart and tidying her expression for a moment.

The door clicked open, and Sylphia let out a sudden, stifled gasp.

“Why are you standing there like that?”

“Oh, well….”

Her mind went blank for a moment at the sudden encounter, but Sylphia steadied her resolve.

“Are… aren’t you hungry? You’ve fasted for a whole day.”

“……A day?”

Kariel tilted his head.

“A day. You say a day.”

“Uh, is… is something wrong?”

“No, nothing.”

That aside.

“Judging by the time, it seems to be early morning. Is that correct?”

“Yes. It is.”

“…I’ll probably get an earful.”

Was he talking about skipping the Academy?

Or about disobeying Lord Lueld’s words?

Still, something felt strange.

“Young Master?”

“What?”

“You seem… a bit different.”

“…How?”

“Well, it’s hard to put into words….”

After a long pause, squeezing out her limited vocabulary, the conclusion she reached was:

“You seem a bit more… mature.”

“There’s no way that could happen overnight, right?”

“I-I guess so? Haha… I’m sorry.”

“No need to be sorry.”

……?

It was strange.

She couldn’t pinpoint exactly what it was.

…But he seemed more mature than before. Was it just her imagination?

====

-How long has it been since you breathed the air of reality?

“…….”

There were moments of awareness that it was a dream of a single night.

Yet, as if he had fallen into a bottomless abyss, the moment he closed his eyes, that asceticism—which felt like an eternity—would naturally resurface day by day.

It wasn’t that it appeared as an imagination, a picture, or a visual dimension, but rather, his body felt a sort of itch.

“It feels more unnatural that I am holding nothing in my hands.”

-Your speech has become too stiff. Why don’t you grease your tongue a bit?

…Is that so?

-When crushed by the weight of years, grudges and anger are bound to subside. How about that?

“I hadn’t given it much thought until you spoke to me.”

But unfortunately.

“Now that I see those things before my eyes, I find myself wondering if claiming I felt nothing was, in fact, a lie and a deception.”

As the Prince’s clique appeared, his feet instinctively faltered, and his body, including his shoulders, stiffened.

He didn’t know how his consciousness felt, but the vigilance etched into his body operated reflexively.

“I guess being lazy feels good? Now that you’ve become the sister’s fiancé, you think you’re above everything, huh?”

“…….”

Red hair, black eyes.

He had a handsome appearance that would likely be favorable as a first impression.

Yet, for some reason, the more he looked at him, the more disgusting he became.

If there were an irreconcilable enemy with whom one could not share the same sky, it would be like this.

In a way, neither side had any real need to hold a grudge.

‘Pathetic.’

That bastard was pathetic.

And Kariel himself, who had been helpless and sickly, crushed by that bastard’s tyranny, was also pathetic.

“Sigh.”

“……?”

The Prince in front of him.

And the expressions of the lackeys around him soured in tandem.

Simply.

Because he had let out a single sigh.

And as expected, the Prince glared, leaning his face in as if to grab him by the collar.

His eyes were burning.

Combined with that fierce expression, his momentum alone looked as if he could burn a person to death.

“I wonder just how great you think you are to act like that every time?”

“…….”

If Seras had been here, would she have stepped in to stop this situation?

He remembered having such expectations, sporadically, in the past.

Back then, he took it for granted that he would be the victim.

…Believing that if he just endured and endured, it would eventually end, he had done nothing but persevere.

That was why he hated facing reality; it was uncomfortable and hateful.

The reason he had counted the moments until the sun set and the moon rose.

…Perhaps it was because, at least in those moments, the freedom to breathe was guaranteed.

Well, thanks to his mother, who gave him various instructions that kept him awake at night, there were many difficulties.

But at least it was less tiring and less painful than when the sun was up.

That was why, even more so.

During the hours the moon faded.

He might have hoped to stay awake as much as possible.

A weak way of thinking.

Truly, disappointingly and pitifully so.

And yet, that was his past.

When would he finally be able to become even slightly free from this wretched and shameful stigma?

“That’s enough, Your Highness.”

“What… did you say? You’re talking to me….”

“Your Highness.”

It was that fellow again.

Thanks to the fellow gesturing with his eyes toward the surroundings, the Prince let out a short snort.

“Let’s have a more in-depth conversation later in a place where there are fewer people. A conversation. A conversation.”

He pointedly poked Kariel’s chest with his index finger.

In the past.

He would have been overwhelmed by the desire and longing to snap that finger.

Yet, he would have been frustrated and despaired at his inability to do so, eventually resigning himself.

He hadn’t even allowed himself to take revenge in his delusions, viewing it as childish and unpleasant.

…Whether it was his own narrow-mindedness or stubbornness.

He disliked it in many ways.

Then.

How was it now?

“Do as you please.”

Indeed, as she said, it seemed he had rotted for quite a while in that place, even if it was a dream.

Without losing his reason to injustice as he had before, and without rotting or breaking himself by forcibly suppressing it.

The current him was a bit more composed than before.

And because of that mere “bit,” he felt a sense of mental and physical peace.

…Just how lacking had his mental leeway been?

“…….”

With the sight of the glaring Prince’s back, he continued walking toward the school gates.

Thinking about it.

…Recalling his past, where he would arrive early to avoid those people’s eyes the moment he went to school, or intentionally arrive at the last second if he thought he was late.

He felt a renewed sense of horror at that unsightly behavior.

Disappointment in himself would be a useless emotion now.

“I shall be waiting. For that ‘conversation’ of yours.”

To see just how wholesome it would be.

====

“Kariel. Do you intend to just sit and watch this time as well?”

“…….”

Kariel looked up blankly at the swordsmanship instructor.

Even under that heavy gaze, he no longer felt intimidated, nor did he feel any particular emotion.

What was the difference from before?

…There was no particular reason.

Had he ever seen a rock or a tree get angry and react violently just because a human mocked them?

The Heart Formula within him already constituted his very being, even without him having to repeat or whisper it to himself.

Therefore.

“I have decided to put down the Imperial Sword.”

“What?”

Perhaps that was why he could boldly utter such words, unlike before.

“Instead, I intend to polish something else. Is that acceptable?”

“…Did Sir Lueld teach you some exotic swordsmanship?”

Despite the words, the mockery in the instructor’s expression was blatant.

“Hardly.”

Are you talking nonsense?

When he returned the mockery with that nuance, the instructor’s complexion distorted beautifully.

“Are you playing word games with me right now?”

“…….”

He wouldn’t have minded continuing to be sarcastic.

But for some reason, even this felt tedious.

In the past, the moment he let one word out, he would have shouted wildly, determined to see it through to the end.

…And because he had been utterly unable to let out that one shout, all the more so.

“Instead of providing me with special attention, please allocate your time equally to the other students.”

“Is that what you call an excuse?”

“Do I look like I’m making an excuse?”

Something was different.

Not only the instructor, but the students who were watching the situation with great interest were equally puzzled by his brazen attitude.

“Teacher~! He looks so confident, why don’t you give him a guided spar right now?!”

“Looks like he learned one new sword technique and thinks the world belongs to him.”

“Giving up the Imperial Sword? Maybe he meant he was abandoned by the Imperial Sword?”

Laughter.

Scoffs.

Ridicule.

Not everyone was like that, but even if the Prince wasn’t physically there, the Prince’s touch reached everywhere.

But.

So what?

“…….”

Furthermore.

Even that noble Princess Highness was not present here.

That was probably why those bastards could act so smug.

Unlike him, they could legally skip the Academy and instead receive responses like “Good work,” “You’ve struggled,” or “We were worried about you”…

‘No, that’s the wrong target for my frustration.’

There was no need to blame Elhermina.

The reason for the blame was: why, when acting the same way, did the other side receive preferential treatment and protection?

Why was he the one reprimanded and scorned, and why was he always the one looked down upon for all to see?

Strictly speaking, there was a difference.

And.

He had no obligation to find a reason to drag the Princess into the comparison.

‘Do not mistake the object of comparison.’

If he had to be precise, it would be problematic to mistake the target of his resentment or hostility.

The one sowing malice was someone else.

Do not mistake the opponent.

Do not let emotions sway you into wasting energy on the wrong place.

Letting emotions boil over was, ultimately, a waste of Mental Power.

That Mental Power should be poured into training, for there was already not enough of it.

“Then let’s do this.”

Kariel scanned the surroundings indifferently.

“Would the teacher personally teach me a lesson?”

Always as if for amusement.

As if to show off, to boast, struggling to stand out.

As a tool for that wretched inferiority complex, venting of frustration, and emotional release.

Just as it had always been.

“You must fulfill the Prince’s wish.”

“…….”

Pretending not to know, even though he knew everything.

However, the moment this was discussed openly in front of everyone, the situation reached an irreversible stage.

But so what?

In any case, I’m not the one in a predicament.

If things go south, I can just die.

Kill today, and kill tomorrow.

“Are you going to do it, or not?”

At some point, I became unable to feel fear toward meaningless things.

However, bound by the habitual treatment I had endured, I had continued to be mistaken.

Must I be terrified because I am helpless and weak?

That is not it.

My fear was, in the end.

A nightmare I created.

Not someone else’s.

……The fact that I realized this.

So late, is a bit regrettable….

…….

No, let me correct that.

I was very… aggrieved.

Very much so.

Very, very much.