Chapter 2

In the end, I had no choice but to accept this unbelievable reality.

Still unable to shake my doubt, I slapped my cheeks a couple more times and even slammed my forehead against the wall.

Honestly, I even considered jumping out the window, but the constellations talked me out of it.

Anyway, despite trying all sorts of things, nothing changed.

I was Astell Ruthius, and Ryu Saan was dead.

‘Why did I die? How did it happen?’

No matter how much I wracked my brain, I couldn’t find an answer.

I felt wronged and depressed, but more than anything, I felt disgusted. It was as if I was being played by one of the Administrator’s sick jokes.

The Administrator is the one in charge, the one who orchestrates the apocalypse. Think of them as a movie director. Hunters are the cast, channels are the film sets, and the constellations are the audience.

Therefore, my possession of this body was no coincidence.

It was the Administrator’s intention.

‘What in the world do you want from me?’

Are they asking me to save this world, just like I did in my past life?

‘But what if I say no?’

I clutched my head and let out a deep sigh.

‘I don’t know. Whatever happens, happens.’

I’ve always wanted to just relax without a single thought, so this works out.

A life of working without a single day off was more than enough in my last life, wasn’t it?

I’m done with being so busy I don’t even have time to eat.

‘I’ll just think of it as a vacation.’

A carefree, unemployed life. I’m going to try that for myself.

“From now on, I’m not Ryu-tto, I’m Astell. Don’t get the names mixed up. Swearing, personal attacks, excessive nagging—you’ll be banned for all of it. Same goes for donating weird items. Just think of this as a Confucian broadcast.”

The chat window was filled with nothing but jeers.

They asked what I was on about, talking about Confucianism in a world that doesn’t even have it.

Messages like, ‘You should be the one to stop swearing, you potty mouth!’ scrolled by one after another.

I had to admit, they had a point. I might have had a *slightly* foul mouth in my past life.

“I’ll have to stop swearing, too. It’s a Confucian broadcast, after all.”

[Mission: Refrain from swearing until midnight today. (10,000 Points)]

[Accept] / [Decline]

When Hunters awaken, they are granted a basic set of powers.

The items sold in the shop are the ‘plus alpha’ to that, and these items can only be exchanged for ‘Points.’

There are only two ways to accumulate points.

Either by acquiring them through missions or donations from the constellations, or by getting them from other Hunters.

The latter was so rare it was practically nonexistent, which meant the constellations were really the only answer.

That’s why Hunters were so fanatically obsessed with points and tried so hard to get on the constellations’ good side.

After all, they needed the constellations to sponsor them with points to exchange for good items in the shop.

‘I used to be one of those Hunters crazy for points, too…’

But now, I had no reason to obsess over them.

I was going to live life on easy mode.

‘Still, no need to refuse a gift.’

I nonchalantly accepted the mission and surveyed the room.

With the vanity smashed to pieces, the room was a complete wreck, as if it had been bombed.

It was a very poor environment for enjoying a carefree, unemployed life.

I picked out the intact items and gathered them to one side. A comb, a few pens, and a thick book. That was all that had survived.

‘I wasn’t this strong before. Is this Astell’s power?’

To think such strength was hidden in this delicate body… You really shouldn’t judge a book by its cover.

I marveled for a moment before scratching the back of my head.

“Astell, I’m not trying to blame you… but I’m sorry. I’ll buy you a new one just like it when I make some money later.”

Then, I picked up the book that was lying wide open and tilted my head.

The book was tattered. Its cover had been patched up so many times that it was difficult to recognize what it originally looked like.

For a princess of the empire…

‘Isn’t a princess a rather high-ranking position?’

She shouldn’t have had any financial problems. Why would she patch up a torn book over and over?

Now that I thought about it, it was strange. It wasn’t just the book; the entire bedroom was shabby.

“How is this place smaller than my old room…?”

The grand mansion I saw during the tutorial was certainly befitting of a ducal family’s name.

Words like ‘enormous’ and ‘magnificent’ suited it perfectly.

But this small, shabby annex, no matter how I looked at it, was not a place a princess would live.

“Huh? But why did I come here?”

After finishing the tutorial, I had walked into the annex so naturally. It was an unconscious action.

‘What’s going on? As a princess, shouldn’t I have gone to the main mansion?’

The moment the question arose.

“…Ugh!”

A dizzying pain shot through my temples.

Then, Astell’s memories, which had previously only offered up answers after a long period of thought, began to unravel and melt into my own.

Like hard clumps of salt slowly dissolving in water.

I waited for the pain to subside and then muttered.

“What, she was kicked out by her father?”

The reason was that his wife had died while giving birth to Astell.

“Is he insane? What did the child do wrong…?”

I turned over the book I was holding. It wasn’t a book, but a diary.

Where it was open, a diary entry for today’s date was written, seemingly just before Astell left the annex.

Imperial Calendar, Year 911, Month X, Day 23

I can see a monster outside the window.

Is this an illusion? Or is it real?

It doesn’t matter.

The sky is so clear.

Now, let’s go meet Mom.

“What is this supposed to mean?”

The sentences were incomprehensible, with no context whatsoever.

I frowned and flipped back to the earlier pages of the diary.

Imperial Calendar, Year 897, Month X, Day 3

My nanny said so.

That I’m an unfortunate child, so I have to live alone in the annex.

Is that why the maids avoid me, and the servants look scared whenever they see me?

I’m scared of being alone…

Why am I an unfortunate child?

Imperial Calendar, Year 899, Month X, Day 24

I heard something strange today.

They said Mom died because of me.

Did I kill my mom?

That’s not true, right?

No!!!!

Imperial Calendar, Year 901, Month X, Day 11

Why was I born?

Why was I born an unfortunate child and killed my mom?

I miss you, Dad.

Tears keep falling, so I can’t write in my diary.

The paper was warped and bumpy from tears, and the ink was smudged all over.

It must have been because of her crying.

I slowly turned the heavy-feeling page.

Imperial Calendar, Year 905, Month X, Day 5

My hands were shaking so much that I spilled my soup.

Vivian screamed at me, saying she was sick and tired of the trouble I caused.

My nanny clicked her tongue, saying she was fed up.

My hand hurt from the hot soup, but no one asked if I was okay.

Imperial Calendar, Year 905, Month X, Day 6

When I woke up in the morning, there was ointment on my hand.

When I asked my nanny, she said she treated it.

I was so surprised. To think she would help a child like me!

Thank you, Nanny. Thank you so much. I’ll be a good girl.

Imperial Calendar, Year 905, Month X, Day 7

In the morning, I saw a handprint on Zenia’s cheek.

Zenia is a maid who was recently assigned to the annex, and she keeps getting handprints on her cheek.

Once before, Zenia’s left eye was bruised black and blue.

I remember it clearly because the day before, Zenia had made me the most delicious cookies in the world.

My nanny said it was because of me. Because I’m an unfortunate child.

She told me to stay away from Zenia because getting close to me would bring her misfortune.

I want to be friends with Zenia…

But I should listen to my nanny, right?

Imperial Calendar, Year 905, Month X, Day 25

I learned an unbelievable truth.

It wasn’t my nanny who put ointment on my hand when I burned it; it was Zenia.

The handprint on Zenia’s cheek the next day was because our nanny had slapped her.

For being nice to me…

Nanny, why did you do it? Why? Just why!

I trusted you so much…

It’s hard to breathe.

Imperial Calendar, Year 908, Month X, Day 30

I can’t go outside.

For a while now, it’s been hard to breathe when there are a lot of people around.

My nanny says I’m faking it.

But it really feels like I’m suffocating to death. How can she say I’m faking it…?

Imperial Calendar, Year 908, Month X, Day 2

It’s been three months since I last went outside.

A rumor has spread through the mansion that I’ve gone mad.

I’m not mad… I just want to live…

People scare me.

Imperial Calendar, Year 909, Month X, Day 2

My nanny said so.

That the whole world knows I’m mad. That’s why they call me the Mad Princess.

Am I really mad?

Until recently, I didn’t think so, but now I’m not so sure.

But one thing is certain.

My very existence has become a stain on my family’s name.

Why am I alive?

Imperial Calendar, Year 910, Month X, Day 16

I’m tired.

I want it to stop now.

After reading this far, I reread today’s entry.

The sentences that had made no sense before were finally clear.

‘Astell was planning to die.’

The place where I had opened my eyes was the front yard of the annex.

The reason Astell, who suffered from anthropophobia and couldn’t even go outside, was out there was to die.

And before she could walk more than a few steps, she died of cardiac arrest from a panic attack.

Astell, abandoned by her father under the accusation of killing her mother at birth.

She struggled with guilt, was betrayed by the nanny she trusted, and even developed a mental illness.

And yet, she never once blamed anyone else.

She simply thought it was all her fault and silently endured all the unjust treatment.

With all the strength she had.

*Drip—*

As I brushed under my eye, I felt a lukewarm wetness.

These were Astell’s tears, and at the same time, they were my own.

Along with her memories, the loneliness, sadness, guilt, and pain… all those emotions flooded into me, and it felt as if my heart was being torn apart.

I wiped away my tears and flipped to the very last page of the diary.

And there, I wrote in small letters with a pen.

Astell, I’ll get revenge for you.

Looks like my carefree, unemployed life won’t be so boring after all.