Chapter 107

Chapter 107

The bodyguards were putting all their strength into blocking or shoving back the people rushing toward us one by one, each for their own reasons. One of them even urgently subdued a reporter who suddenly tried to physically attack Jeong Seojin.

I gave a slight nod of thanks toward the bodyguards, who were truly dedicated to their jobs. Of course, they didn’t see my gratitude since they were busy blocking reporters who were shouting things like, “There’s a rumor the two of you had a secret marriage—!!” as they charged at us.

Beyond the narrow path carved out by the bodyguards’ efforts, outside the airport’s automatic glass doors, black cars emblazoned with the Heewon Guild mark were lined up in a row.

Several people stood in front of those black cars, which were sure to be scorching hot under the blazing summer sunlight. The moment my eyes met one of them, I paused my steps for just a moment.

‘…Maybe I’ve finally sorted out my feelings now.’

Hair the color of deep bronze that reminded me of an old tree, and eyes that brought to mind the leaves of a deep-rooted tree brimming with profound vitality. As if drawn in, I quickened my pace and silently formed his name on my lips.

‘Mr. Yoon Juyeong.’

* * *

The journey from the airport, through the guild, and back home was silent, without a single word spoken. For my part, I kept my mouth shut, planning to wait until Mr. Yoon Juyeong spoke first, and Jeong Seojin stayed behind at the guild, saying he had something to take care of.

And Mr. Yoon Juyeong, after his initial greeting of welcome to me, focused on driving without saying another word.

In the end, Mr. Yoon Juyeong only opened his mouth again after the black car he was driving arrived at the house.

“We’ve arrived, Master.”

“Thank you. Ah, I’ll undo my own seatbelt.”

I stopped Mr. Yoon Juyeong, who was leaning over as if to undo my seatbelt for me, then unfastened it myself and opened the car door. Mr. Yoon Juyeong silently stared at me for a moment without saying anything, then unfastened his own seatbelt and began to get out of the car as well.

While Mr. Yoon Juyeong was getting out of the car, I took a moment to look around at the surroundings. The garden, dyed red by the slowly approaching evening glow, had seasonal flowers showing off their individual colors, and through the window leading to the living room in the distance, pale blue curtains swayed leisurely in the wind.

‘It was only a period of less than two weeks at most…’

This scenery felt more welcoming than I had expected. Had I grown attached to this place without even realizing it myself? I thought to myself with a fresh sense of wonder, then looked up at Mr. Yoon Juyeong, who had come to stand beside me.

“Your gardener will have prepared dinner.”

“Then I’ll wash up quickly and eat. But first…”

Beyond the red-tinged twilight, Mr. Yoon Juyeong wore an expression that was hard to pin down precisely.

“Have you sorted out your thoughts now?”

“……”

“You’ve been avoiding me for a while now.”

“…I’m sorry. For me to dare—”

“No, you don’t need to apologize. I’m just asking out of pure curiosity. Whether you’ve sorted out your thoughts, or at least… come to some conclusion, even a little.”

Mr. Yoon Juyeong’s green eyes wandered through the air for a moment, as if they had lost their purpose. But fortunately, before long, his gaze fixed on me again. With an expression as if he was holding something back, he cautiously reached out a hand toward me.

“…First of all, at least, I’d like to say it inside. So… over there, on the bench set up in the garden.”

“Then let’s do that.”

It certainly felt a bit off to have a serious conversation without even stepping into the garden yet. I took Mr. Yoon Juyeong’s hand and stepped into the garden. The garden, which my gardener and Mr. Yoon Juyeong had personally tended while I was in England, was thick with the scent of flowers in season.

Mr. Yoon Juyeong carefully led me to the bench, as if escorting me. I sat down on the bench as he guided me, then pulled on the arm of him standing there as if he had no intention of sitting. Mr. Yoon Juyeong resisted following my will for a moment, but before long, with a silent, faint sigh, he sat down beside me.

“Can you talk now?”

“…Sor—”

“Like I said before, you don’t need to apologize.”

I truly wasn’t angry at him at all. …Well, of course. If you wanted to dig up the past, maybe there might be something. But regardless, at this point in time, there definitely wasn’t. I pressed down on the dark shadow stretching out with the evening glow with the tip of my foot and opened my mouth again.

“I’m just curious about what you think, Mr. Yoon Juyeong. About the things you’ve been thinking and agonizing over, even to the point of avoiding running into me.”

“……”

The muggy heat unique to summer and the cool wind that followed the approaching evening crossed paths.

After a hesitation that felt both long and short, Mr. Yoon Juyeong finally spoke after the second hand had moved dozens of times.

“…You probably don’t remember this, Master, but I… I’ve met you before. In the past.”

“……”

“It was… a rainy day. I… I just… didn’t want to live anymore. The total weight of life felt heavier than death, so… so I……”

That day, the rain was pouring down.

A night in some city where there were no stars in the sky and no grass on the ground. In that place, there was a man on the brink of death, and a woman who held nothing in her hands but an umbrella.

And then.

And then, the woman who covered the man with a worn-out umbrella, while she herself got soaked in the rain and smiled brightly.

There was someone who could do that.

“You told me that life doesn’t necessarily have to be worth something.”

“……”

Does life have to be something of value?

Wasn’t life inherently valuable in itself from the start?

If so, even if what fills that life is worthless, even if it’s meaningless and ridiculed, trampled, and insulted by others, you still have the right to live, the reason to breathe, and the right to feel the world.

“You… reached out your hand to me, Master.”

The outstretched hand was cold, far from warm. But the man dared to take that cool body temperature as his salvation. Amid the pouring rain, there was a man who bent over with his eyes closed, and a touch that rested on his shoulder.

And also, a blessing poured down over his head, with neither purpose nor direction, just falling endlessly.

“Even so, if life feels heavier than death to you.”

Amid the roughly pouring rain, in that tiny world where only the old umbrella served as a support, the woman whispered softly.

“Life is inherently valuable in itself, but people are bound to feel sorrow when they aren’t acknowledged for it. So, if you are in pain and suffering.”

The force of the rain, which had been falling like a waterfall, began to weaken noticeably. As the noise crashing in from outside subsided, the man slowly lifted his head.

“Your life, your death, and you yourself.”

The woman smiled.

“At least I will always affirm them.”

Her silver eyes were as brilliant as the North Star shining above a lost traveler’s head.

That day, he became a traveler who had finally found his destination.

Swoosh— When the man’s long yet short story of the past came to an end, a wind blew through the spot where he and I sat. The wind carried the heat and humidity of summer, the coolness of evening, and the scent of flowers from the garden. I took all of it into my breath and silently met Mr. Yoon Juyeong’s gaze.

“I know what you wish from me, Master.”

“……”

“As the one who affirmed me, I clearly and fully understand that you want a relationship… not one forced into this shape, but one simply formed between people.”

He was clearly speaking of understanding, but his green eyes trembled as if denying it. From his contradiction, I read the gap between reason and emotion.

“But, Master.”

As if confirming that my reading was correct, he began to speak of emotion after reason.

“I’m still not free from the past where I was abandoned and trampled because I couldn’t prove my worth.”

“……”

“The past where my origins, my growth, and even my results were meaningless, where I wasn’t allowed a proper life or death, and didn’t belong anywhere… it’s still vivid.”

The man reached out his hand to me. I quietly looked at the large hand extended toward me. Like a child facing immense terror, the man’s big hand was trembling finely.

I closed my eyes tightly for just a moment, then opened them and slowly grasped the man’s hand.

Only then did the trembling that had lingered in his hand finally stop.

“Please give me a little leeway.”

His hand held mine, his fingers entwined with mine. From that small movement gripping my hand, I wondered if, in fact, it was I who had been bound, and he who had done the binding.

“Please, even if it’s just for a little while. Until I can… at least hold your hand on my own.”

Until then, please let this relationship of ours stay as it is.

The man whispered like that, then pulled my captured hand up and pressed his lips to it. Feeling the warmth of another person’s body heat against the back of my hand, I lowered my gaze.

“…If it’s just for a little while.”

I had no intention of being satisfied with this stagnant relationship.

However, I also had no intention of silencing his opinion for the sake of my own thoughts.

“If it’s just for a little while, I’ll do as Mr. Yoon Juyeong says. At least until this winter comes.”

Wasn’t that how all things in the world worked? No matter how righteous one’s goal, reaching it always took a long time. And so, holding the pitiful one who trembled precariously in my arms, I closed my eyes.